1. What would make the next few days easier?
Choose a specific need, such as a meal, a ride, help with another child, an appointment or someone to sit with you while you make a call.
The need I want to address:
Why it matters now:
What can wait or be simplified:
2. What is the whole task?
Think about planning, preparation and follow-up, as well as the visible activity. For example, responsibility for a meal can include deciding what to make, obtaining food and cleaning up.
The task:
Planning, preparation and follow-up included:
Information the helper needs:
3. Who can I ask?
Use roles or first names if that is enough. Keep private details out of a copy you intend to share widely.
| Person or organization | Specific request | Day or time | Has the person agreed? |
|---|---|---|---|
Example request: “Could you pick up groceries on Thursday afternoon? I can send a list in the morning. Please let me know if that time will work.”
4. What do we need to agree on?
Discuss these points with the person helping. For example, someone may agree to buy the groceries while you choose the items and budget.
- How will we confirm the arrangement?
- What choices remain mine or belong to another caregiver?
- What information may be shared with others?
- How will the helper let me know if plans change?
Our agreement:
5. What is the backup?
The backup may be another person, a different time, a simpler task or a call to a service provider. Do not assume someone is available without asking.
If the arrangement changes, we will:
Contact information for any service involved:
6. Did the help fit?
Return to this section after the arrangement has been tried. Note what to keep and what needs to change before asking for help again.
What made a difference:
What created extra work or needs to change:
The next arrangement to confirm:
Keep the plan useful and private
This is a personal planning tool, not a service application or emergency plan. Keep completed notes in a place you choose. The worksheet does not submit your answers to NPF. For urgent help, use support services.
Completed example: help with a weekday meal
This fictional example shows how one task can be made specific. The details are for practice; they do not describe an NPF service or a family's record.
Need: Dinner on the day of a parent's appointment, without a visit to host.
Whole task: A friend checks food preferences, obtains the food and brings it at an agreed time. The household does not need to return a container immediately.
Request: “Would you bring dinner on Wednesday at six? Please leave it at the door and message when it arrives. We are keeping that evening quiet.”
Agreement: The friend confirms by Tuesday evening. Only food preferences and delivery instructions are shared. The friend does not need appointment or medical details.
Backup: If the friend cannot do it, they say so by the agreed check-in. The household uses a simpler meal already available. If that backup is not possible, the need remains unresolved and another arrangement has to be discussed.
Afterward: The meal helped. The delivery time was too close to another task, so next time the household asks for an earlier drop-off.
A small version for a busy day
If completing the whole worksheet is too much, use these five lines:
Today I need: ________________________________________
I will ask: __________________________________________
They have agreed to: _________________________________
If that changes: _____________________________________
We will check again: _________________________________
Leave a line blank when there is no agreement yet. That makes the remaining need visible. A hope that someone might help should not look like a confirmed arrangement.
Use the shared care guide if you want to discuss ongoing responsibilities rather than a single task.
Related resources
Read about postpartum support planning · Save this worksheet as text
Edition: October 2026. National Parenting Foundation. See reuse and permissions.